journal day - no regrets

As usual I'm a little late, but I'm still making it happen for Journal Day with Sometimes Sweet. The latest journal prompt is:
If you had a free pass to go back and change anything in your past, with the promise that it would only affect you positively, would you do it? And if so, what would you change?

I'm not sure how old I was, but at some point during my teenage years (which were filled with melodramatic regrettable moments of epic proportions) that I decided it wasn't worth regretting my actions or decisions. Whenever something happened that I thought could warrant an aftertaste of regret, I told myself that it wasn't worth the energy. I learned my lesson, and so I pressed forward. This was likely the result of being a teenager who needed a thicker skin...
While I really haven't had any big moments in my life that I wish I would have done differently, the one I often look back on is my decision to pursue a degree in architecture. It was an intense, 5 year program that I struggled through at times... And the degree? Lets just say I'm using it creatively... BUT when I think about it now, I wouldn't have done it any other way. My college years were amazing! I became a member of a sorority, I made some very special friendships, and I spent a semester in Rome, Italy. I also learned that while I'm not an architect, I have other creative strengths that can translate to a different career. Learning the mechanics of most design programs comes easily to me, and teaching myself new things through the use of Help and Google is something I figured out in college, too. The architecture curriculum was as much about learning your own way to work and think as it was about learning to design a building... usually, your thought process was as important as your end result, and your design was only as good as your presentation of it. I got some valuable skills out of that degree program!
Had I not gone to RPI (and the only reason I even knew about the school was the architecture program) my life would be completely different... And while it could be better in some ways, I don't feel that I'm on the wrong path or I didn't do what was best for me. College isn't the end of learning anyway, I'm still learning new things every day...
So, I guess it really isn't regret as long as you learn from it!

<3 barb

journal day - what I know

Well, I'm a little late to the party, but I think the Journal Day series by Danielle is pretty awesome... so I'm going to post it anyway. I figure, she hasn't posted a new prompt yet so this one isn't expired!

The prompt posted on Sometimes Sweet last week is:
The older we get, the more certain we get about who we are and what our purpose is. For me, a lot of it is still unknown, but as I make my way down my own path, I have begun to realize that there are indeed some inevitable truths that I know for sure. On your own blog, write a post that talks about "the one thing you know for sure."

I've been rolling that around in my head for about a week now, and I keep thinking "I don't know anything for sure." And maybe I don't... But is that so bad? Truthfully, I'm only 25 and I really don't know where I'm heading in life. I hope that I've put myself on the right path, that I'm learning more about myself, and that I'm making the right decisions based on who I wish to become... but I don't know that for sure, not at all. It's been a trial and error process to get to this point, and I'm fairly certain it will continue to be that way throughout my life. Is that what I'm sure of? The fact that I'm not sure at all? Maybe, but that would be so cliche...
When I was 17, I was sure that I wanted to be an architect... I went to college and got my degree in architecture, and somewhere along the way I realized that wasn't really me. When I was 10, I was sure that I would be married by now... but I'm not, and I'm actually very happy with where I currently am in life, looking forward to a beautiful future. When I was 6, I was sure that my new baby sister would instantly be my best friend... I wouldn't say it happened instantly, but she is now!
I think that I can be sure things will keep changing, both in reality and in my perception... Which isn't necessarily a bad thing. Every day holds the possibility of something totally unexpected, exciting, and new. As long as I keep moving forward and pushing myself to do what's best for me, I'm pretty sure I'll be ok. I can't be sure what tomorrow will bring, but I can be sure that right now, I'm happy.

<3 barb

journal day - first

On Monday, I saw something pretty cool on one of the blogs that I read. Danielle at Sometimes Sweet is a former English teacher, and she's bringing that experience to her blog with a weekly Journal Day prompt. The nerdy kid in me thinks this is awesome, and I'm hoping to participate every week :-)


This weeks prompt:
Describe a "first" (first date, first lie, the first time you experienced something, first time in a particular setting, etc). Include as many details as possible to paint a picture.

I was always one of those nerdy/crazy kids who looked forward to the first day of school. I know it was partly because I would get to see my friends every day after a long summer apart, but it was also because the first day always felt like a fresh start. It was a new beginning, the start of a new adventure (yes, new teachers and new subjects and maybe even new friends DO seem like a big adventure when you're young).
I remember especially vividly the first day of 6th grade; I'd be going to intermediate school, taking the bus each day, and for the first time I would be changing classes throughout the day. It was probably the coolest thing my friends and I could ever imagine... we had heard that in 6th grade not only could you wear makeup to school, but you could chew gum in class!


In preparation to be the coolest kid in school, I got a new haircut that year... specifically "the Rachel" haircut that Jennifer Aniston made famous. I also got new clothes, and I remember the polyester button down that I chose for the first day (no, this was not the 70's, it was 1997) and while I can't remember my jeans, you can bet they were wide leg or bell bottomed. I'm not totally sure why I thought it was a cool outfit, I think there were some particularly hideous brown oxford clunky heeled shoes as well, but I really couldn't have picked anything better in my mind.
Anyway, I woke up at about 4 in the morning that day... I couldn't sleep thinking about how awesome it would be. I remember sitting on the couch in the dark, watching music videos on MTV, Fiona Apple had a new one that comes to mind. Eventually I got ready, headed to the bus stop, and went on my way to school. I'd like to think it was every bit as awesome as I imagined... so I'll stop before I get into how outrageously awkward and silly those years were.
I don't remember my first day of high school or college, not what I wore, not what I thought. Starting high school, I remember being just as anxious heading off to Cross Country Team training camp before school actually started. And college? Well on move in day, I wouldn't let my dad stop for a bathroom break within an hour of campus. It's funny how when you look back on "firsts" you think about how long ago it was, how young you were, but in the moment, it was the oldest you ever felt, not to mention the coolest :-)

<3 barb

P.S. Is anyone else journaling with Sometimes Sweet? I'd love if you'd link up!